Commercial Analysis

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Preemptive Strike

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“Here in Lynchburg, Tennessee we speak English mostly because that is the language that we speak, but also because English makes everything sound more – intriguing. Staplers. Shoes. ‘Mi Roberto.’ No – ‘Robert.’ Piano. Okay maybe not the best example. Of course Jack Daniels is already so intriguing there is only one word that could describe it: ‘delicisoso’? No – delicious.”

So if you acknowledge that this is why you prefer Kahlua over Jack Daniels, then it’s okay to continue to prefer Kahlua over Jack Daniels for that very reason? If you’re not explicit about it and you only do it with liquor and not staplers and shoes like this woman is doing, then it’s okay to continue to be pretentious? Why, again, should I buy Kahlua? What about it is so superior to domestic, “non-exotic” spirits that warrants spending money on it and not those?

In other words: there isn’t anything exceptional about it. Kahlua really has been preying upon your pretentious desire to impress your friends all these years. But don’t be angry with them because your undeserved acquisition of values has run it’s course, there is a way to extend it: just pretend you were joking this whole time. They will even give you a commercial to help you convince your friends that you were.

This is how desperate Western business is to make a buck. This is the kind of psychological manipulation they have lowered themselves to engaging in. This is what happens when the economy is so heavily taxed and regulated – so profoundly at the mercy of the every-shifting whims of government policy – that no long-term planning is possible. When a business or industry can never know what is around the next corner there is no point in trying to sell your product on it’s merits. That takes too long. Instead, you have to do what you have to do – no matter how dishonorable – to get as much cash as you can as quick as you can.


Written by commercialanalysis

November 24, 2010 at 10:17 pm

Posted in Food and Drink

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